Conviction to the max...

I don't really have anything to say, to add or take away from this video. I know how my heart feels right now and I know how it has been feeling lately. I have so much, why do I ever think I need more?

So much time, so little to do...

I don't know about the rest of the world...but I found this video to be both hilarious and disturbing. I mean who thinks like this and who spends this much time putting this together? Obviously this guy is either crazy or genius (or both). Since you can buy t-shirts with Charlie's likeness all over them for $20+, I'm leaning toward genius.

By the way, if you like this kind of weird, creepy video..."Salad Fingers" is worth a watch.

Honey, I have an idea...

I don't know what this guy does for a living, but he should be in sales after pitching this idea to his soon-to-be wife. I doubt this would have gotten past security at my wedding.

What a difference a year makes...

As I sit here on my couch in the middle of the night, I keep thinking about how much my life has changed in the past year. Last year, right now, I was trying to get a few hours sleep before my wife's contractions got to the point of needing a hospital. Waiting for my son to be born was the longest, scariest, and most exciting time of my life. Holding him and hearing his little cry was completely life-changing. Little did I know just how much 'life-change' he would bring. He has changed the way I see and respond to everything. For example...

God: Sure most of us have heard God referred to as "Father" but until now, I didn't really understand the allusion. I guess I thought that if God was my father, he would be the one to go to when it was time for allowance, vacation, or worst...punishment. For some people, the image of God as a father is totally negative because of their own father-figure(s) here, or lack thereof. For me, becoming a dad changed everything. It's no longer about allowance and punishment. It's about love and maturity. I love my son so much...so much that at times he doesn't get his way. It isn't good to chew on electrical cords. One day he will understand that I'm not out to ruin his fun. I'm out to protect him because I love him. And sometimes love is punishment. Maybe I'm finally beginning to understand that all those times when I didn't get my way or was disciplined by my 'dad', it was for my own good...because God loves me and wants me to mature into the man he desires me to be.

Culture: This is a big one because it encompasses all of earthly life. Everything that I experience here on this earth is a part of its culture. Thinking about my son, that scares me to death. Not because I am afraid of his being exposed to the 'culture' of the world. On the contrary, I want him to know and experience (most of) the world around him. I want him to grow up knowing that there are people and things that have no respect or regard for God and I want it to break his heart. So often we are so scared of being influenced by the world we live in that we take all our influence and lock it up in Christian schools, church buildings, and 'fellowship groups.' The only problem I see with that is that it doesn't seem to add up to what Jesus taught and how he lived. I want my son to walk with Christ, even if that means going where no other saint has.

Myself: So here is my self-reflection section. I'll keep it short because you don't care and I don't know you well enough to pour all my deep, dark secrets out just yet. Basically, what I want to say about this is that my son has laid me bare and sometimes, it scares the hell out of me. I want my son to look to me for lots of things. I want him to want to be like his daddy. Problem is...I don't want him to be like his daddy. I want him to be better. I want him to love harder and care more. I want him to follow Christ closer and resist temptation better. I want him to give more of himself away and live better, and longer, and fuller. I want him to be even more than I can imagine for him. That is my prayer. And you know what, he's got a pretty good start already.

So, in closing, that's what's on my mind this late night/early morning. It's amazing how much one little person can change in a year...and my son has changed a lot, too.

Nine degrees

That's the forecast for tonight here in Oklahoma. Those meteorologists say this is 'pipe bursting' cold weather. I really hope that doesn't happen. I can't imagine trying to clean up that mess.

Speaking of cleaning up...this snow storm has made me think a lot about my faith and my God. I don't know what it is, but there is something very spiritual about snow falling and blanketing the ground. Maybe its because it is pure, or white, or that it completely covers everything it falls on. Or maybe its because, in its own special way, it makes everything look new and clean. Snow makes me think of grace.

Its hard to imagine anyone looking at snow and saying "no thanks, I'll pass." Now don't get me wrong, there are some things about snow that aren't great or easy. You have to shovel it, you have to bundle up, you have to change yourself to be in it. But for me, as long as the snow is here, its worth it. The same is true for grace. You have to, in a way, prepare for it because once your in it, you are never the same. Like snow, you are new and clean. What a beautiful thing.

But I've also been thinking about my friends from southern California. They have never experienced a snowfall where they are. They've probably seen it on tv or heard about what its like, but experience is a totally different animal. You will never know what the rest of us are talking about until you step outside, look up, and find yourself being covered with it. The same is true of grace and those who have never experienced it. That is a much greater shame than to have no snow. It is grace that trumps all experience we can have on this earth and it breaks my heart to know that there are many who have never experienced it before. Knowing God loves you and experiencing that love through forgiveness and rebirth are totally different.

So as I sit at home with a crackling fire, I will think about ways to introduce grace to those who don't know it. Another great thing about grace...as you go to take it to others, it won't melt on your way.

Thanksgiving fever

My 9 month old son kept us up last night with a 102.4 degree fever. As I tried to put him back to sleep last night, it felt like I was rocking a 20 pound baked potato. Needless to say, plans were greatly altered. Today, we are spending turkey day at home, instead of with our extended family. And our smoked turkey and homemade dressing is being replaced with a processed 'turkey' substance and stuffing, from a box.

Funny thing, though; as I walked around our local market picking up a make-shift Thanksgiving dinner I realized something. I am more thankful to be right here, with my beautiful wife and our 'wonderboy', than anywhere else. This is Thanksgiving for me. I have a great family, a wonderful job, a nice house, and a 4 pound watch-dog that tops it all off.

Don't get me wrong, family gatherings are great but for me, the things I am most thankful for are surrounding me on my couch right now. I couldn't ask for anything more, especially since my son's fever broke about 2 hours ago. Happy Thanksgiving!

Election day

Parking spaces were hard to find this morning. No, I wasn't going to walk laps at the mall. I was trying to get to work on time. See, our church is a polling place for the city of Edmond and as I drove around the parking lot, trying to park, I kept wondering to myself: "Do these people know more than I do?" What I mean is this: The past few months I have been bombarded with commercials, newspaper ads, and phone calls trying to convince me to vote for Candidate A over Candidate B. However, one thing I have noticed is that none of the candidates (at least around here) ever talk about what they really believe and what they plan to do if in office. Instead, they spend millions of dollars on commercials that tell us that they love the flag and hate Mexicans more than their competitor. Well crap! I know who I'm voting for!

Seriously, I don't care if you worship the flag or our country or despise our neighbors to the south, but don't insult my intelligence by thinking that is all I want to hear about. Who cares about education reform? Who cares about the future of Social Security? Who cares about issues that can make a difference in our world right now? WE LOVE THE FLAG!

I know this is a bit of a stretch, but I sometimes feel like the election process hasn't changed since high school student council. I mean, why don't we just vote for the cheerleader who promises the best selection of cafeteria a la carte? It didn't make much sense then, and it doesn't make much sense now. But hey, who cares about the issues? Get out and vote, regardless of whether you know your candidates' stances. Besides, at least now there might be chicken strips.